Wellness Tool: Turning Negative Self-Talk into Helpful Statements

Purpose

This tool helps you notice the unhelpful messages you tell yourself and consciously reshape them into supportive, realistic statements. Rather than ignoring or fighting negative self-talk, you learn to respond to it with clarity, self-respect, and balance — creating inner dialogue that supports your wellbeing.

Steps

1. Notice your inner self-talk

   When negative self-talk or unhelpful rumination occurs, take a moment to acknowledge it. Write the thoughts down if helpful, without editing or judging them.

   
   

2. Prioritise what has the most impact

   If you have a list of thoughts, identify the thoughts that most affect your mood, confidence, or actions. These are the ones worth working with first.

   
   

3. Reframe each thought into a supportive truth

   For each statement, ask:

   • What is a fair, balanced, and realistic truth I can respond with?

   • What is and is not in my control here?

   • What am I assuming, and what is reasonably true?

   This is not about forced positivity. It is about accuracy, compassion, and perspective.

   
   

4. Develop an alternative statement

   Turn each supportive truth into a short, clear statement or affirmation. Use language that feels believable and helpful, not exaggerated or idealised.

   
   

5. Use them when you need them

   Keep your statements accessible and return to them during moments of doubt, stress, or rumination. Allow them to guide your response rather than your automatic negative self-talk.

Negative self-talk often reflects assumptions, predictions, mind-reading, or habits linked to self-identity rather than truth. By turning these thoughts into supportive statements, you are practising self-awareness and intentional response — two skills that strengthen emotional wellbeing over time. Each time you pause, reframe, and respond differently, you are building a more self-compassionate and supportive relationship with yourself.

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Next Steps

Bring this knowledge into your decision-making and coaching sessions to make faster, more informed progress toward your goals.

This tool is fully accessible within the Women’s Wellbeing Lab. If you would like to extend this work, the Lab offers psychology-informed tools, articles, and resources designed to support reflection, clarity, and intentional action.

You can explore the Lab with a 7-day free trial and access a full library of wellbeing support in a way that fits your real life.

Explore The Women's Wellbeing Lab

Reference

Develop Your Assertiveness by Sue Bishop (2013)